Don’t shoot the messenger here, but this is not good news for the average Joe.
New research using plastic 3D penis models found that women prefer a larger than average penis for both a one-night stand and a relationship.
The research, lead by Dr Nicole Prause, is thought to be more accurate because the women surveyed used a real erect model, instead of the usual 2D flacid drawings – or their abstract imaginations.
Dr Prause, a neuroscientist at UCLA, and her team created 100 different erect penis possibilities, which she narrowed down to 33 that were 3D-printed in blue rubber.
…I wonder what happens with those after the experiment.
Anyway, 75 women were asked to select two ideal penises from the basket, one for a fleeting night of passion, and one for a long-term partner.
The biggest dick in the basket was just shy of nine inches, and the smallest just over four inches.
And the results revealed… Women’s ideal size for a long-term boyfriend’s penis was 6.3 inches long, and 4.8 inches in girth.
According to the NHS, the average penis length is 5.16 inches when erect, with a girth of 4.59 inches. When it comes to a fling, women want an even bigger penis, with the dream peen being 6.4 inches long, with a girth of 5 inches.
Talking about why women might want different penis sizes for different relationships, Dr Prause told Broadly:
A larger penis likely carries the risk of more pain and injury. However, women might tolerate this risk to receive the sexual pleasure benefits that are more likely the goal of a one-time partner.
Dr Prause also cleared up what happened to the blue penises:
They are in a conference bag under my bed. No, they are not ‘in use’, nor have they ever been. I’m taking them to a Nerd Nite talk with me. I plan to have these a very long time. I also hope they might be useful in intimidating undesirable mates.
But don’t worry guys, size doesn’t matter.
As they say, you want her heart, make her laugh… so, pulling your trousers down should do the trick.